Ode to the DMV

by Jenine Baines

Pardon my French. But fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

Oh, it could have been worse:
I could have neglected
to make an appointment in advance
and wound up in a line
snaking outside the door,
around the building;
I could have flunked the written test
more than once.
Grâce à Dieu, my partners
in this morning’s menage à trois
were focused
on my satisfaction.
Which helped,
except the happy ending
was solely up to me –
and as I told
both gals afterward, FUCK!
I’m too damned old
for this kind of stimulation.
Get me to a nunnery.
I’m done with all intercourse
with the DMV.


Jenine Baines is an author, poet, and former Texan now living in Los Angeles who views the River Walk as Wonderland, a place that is “curiouser and curiouser.”  Actually, all places are curious wonderlands – an epiphany “j” attempts to convey in her essays and poetry. She also publishes on Medium.com at https://medium.com/@jeninebsharahbaines and is at work on editing her first book of essays, “You Don’t Have to Tell Everybody Everything: Confessions of a Chatty Cathy and Late Bloomer.”

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